let me borrow that top

fuck-benedict:

new favourite insults:

  • absolute bagel
  • useless paperclip
  • first bread slice
  • yellow marker that was used to colour over something dark and now colours a really distressing muddy yellowish-brown
  • tangled headphone cord
  • ketchup pre-cum

caramelfringe:

offensive things to call people when they’re mean to you:

  • crispy nipple
  • the white stringy things in bananas
  • tangled umbilical cord
  • nash grier
  • iceberg lettuce: world’s blandest green
  • watery afro
  • fountain water at school that never tastes right
  • voldemort’s breathing holes
  • ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ

cryforce:

thewriterkid:

Fun things to say when someone tells you they’re going to go to the bathroom:

  • Stay safe
  • Congratulations
  • That’s what they all say
  • Different strokes for different folks
  • I hope you have the time of your life
  • But you have so much to live for
  • Please explain
  • think of me

thewriterkid:

Fun things to say when someone tells you they’re going to go to the bathroom:

  • Stay safe
  • Congratulations
  • That’s what they all say
  • Different strokes for different folks
  • I hope you have the time of your life
  • But you have so much to live for
  • Please explain

itslovelylittledreamer:

I wish it was normal to ask your teacher to hang out outside of school. And also I wish it was normal to fuck the shit out of them.

lunarbirth:

mom: honey, what would you like for your birthday?! :)

me:

image

mom: no silly!! i mean a REAL present!!! 

me:

image

the-onion-slut:

I used to be a straight A student

Now I’m not even straight

pussymold:

Can I just tell you all about this one day I went to school and a girl who sat in front of me told me to look in her sleeve

pussymold:

Can I just tell you all about this one day I went to school and a girl who sat in front of me told me to look in her sleeve

he’s back and ready for the next holiday